Connecting the dots

http://blog.insideview.com/2010/04/27/connecting-the-dots-how-sales-2-0-can-help-you-connect-with-prospects/

The socks you'd love to get in!

The sentience of solitude

Solitude to me came unannounced.

And when it hit me hard, little fragments of me lay all over – trying to crawl back – and then grow wings and fly. While so, I realized solitude gushes in the readiness to perceive sensations of the undifferentiated, elementary consciousness.

The quiescence in the lull of my inky room exhorted helplessly. I would have turned a deaf ear, but I needed someone to talk to. The clock ticked. And staring me in the eye, stole away the dream I had woken up with. I would have fought time, but there is no contending the connivance of the clockwork universe. It tears me apart.

The wind blew the curtains and let in the chaotic sounds of the city, seething with activity. An array of beams made my inky room blush, while the shimmering drops of sun made their way and settled on the coarse, grey surfaces. My dream lingers. Basking in its beauty, I let it consume me. What I wouldn’t do to spiral in and lose in it again!

In a corner lies a paintbrush and colours, calling me to mix them up in a mélange of hues. I heed to their cogent reasons. Out comes a dusty sheet. Plumes of white smoke go up the ceiling, dance with the sunbeams and evanesce. The paintbrush is capricious, but I bend it. It screeches… the paper chafes... I breathe – and the sounds echo.

In a tiny supernova of sorts, the acrylic scatters like ice from a spoon and suffuses the paper. My hands feel numb. The winds carry a chill. The sounds of the city fade. The beams retract, and the little drops of sun vaporize.

…and when I’m done, I hate myself at my inability to draw me a pretty picture. At my inability to paint it all right. The sound of the clock is unceasingly chaotic. True, there is no contending the connivance of the clockwork universe, but my dreams are mine alone… and I spiral in and lose myself again…

Dogs v/s. Humans. (Trust me, this is tight!)

Humans don't smell someone's genitals when they meet them for the first time, or as a general form of greeting.

~ Dogs 0, Humans 1

When humans piss where they wish to, they’re cruddy. If a dog does that, they mark their territory.

~ Dogs 1, Humans 1

Except for some tribes, you wouldn’t see a rabble when humans have sex. There isn’t any howling/ growling/ barking around. Dogs group together & always try & pull the mates apart. Plus, there is the howling/ growling/ barking.

~ Dogs 1, Humans 2

If your family loves you enough, you don't have to dilate your pupils at meals, wag or woof to nip in a bite or two.

~ Dogs 1, Humans 3

If humans were to lie down on their backs, legs up in the air, their privates on display, there is a fair chance they’d be arrested for indecorous behaviour. When dogs do the same, its only to cool off, or maybe for a scratch.

~ Dogs 2, Humans 3

If you're a human & you sit with your tongue hanging out, that is deviant behavior. When dogs do the same, they are panting.

~ Dogs 3, Humans 3

Oooh… this is tight!

When in a car, if humans drool with their heads hanging out the window, people look away thinking of them as greedy perverts. When dogs do, they draw attention.

~ Dogs 3, Humans 4

Humans can never do it doggie-style, the way a dog does it.

~ Dogs 4, Humans 4

If you're a dog & you eat a human, you're rabid. If you're a human & you eat a dog, you're Chinese.

~ Dogs 4, Humans 5

For a human, at the doctors’, you don’t have to get your ass probed for every little sign of illness.

~ Dogs 4, Humans 6

Puppies look cuter than human babies.

~ Dogs 5 Humans 6

On that subject, as research & stats go, even dog adults look cuter than human adults.

~ Dogs 6 Humans 6

Except for humans who are too lazy to shower once every donkey year, there aren’t any fleas on them.

(I happen to know one such human who does).

~ Dogs 6, Humans 7

Nancy’s about as bitchy as dogs can get.

~ Dogs 7, Humans 7

Didn’t I tell you this was tight?

:)

These kids today!

ABC of Punjabis

A is for Adjust, Punjabis will always ask you to adjust whenever they want to push you around.

B is for Backside, and it has nothing to do with your bum, it is an instruction to go to the rear of a building, or block, or shop or whatever.

C is for Cloney and its first name is not George nor is it a process for replicating sheep, it is an area where people live eg. Defence cloney.

D is for Dilliwalas staying in Defence Cloney.

E is for expanditure, and believe me Punjabis are not scared of spending money, the latest cars, marble floors, their ambitions are always expanding.

F is for fackade, and even though it sounds like a bad word it is actually just the front of a building (with backside being the back of building of course).

G is for Gaddi and the way a Punjabi can pilot a car puts any F1driver to shame, if the Grand Prix does come to Delhi there's no way Hamilton, Alonso or Kimi can overtake Balvinder, Jasvinder and Sukhvinder.

H is for Ho Jayega, the moment you hear that, you have to be very careful because you can be reasonably sure its not going to happen.

I is for Intezaar, to know more about it see P.

J is for Jindagi and if there's one person who knows how to live life to the full it's a Punjabi.

K is for Khurana, etc. The Punjabi equivalent of the Jonses i.e., keeping up with the Khuranas.

L is for Lovely but she never is.

M is for Mrooti. The car that moved an entire Punjabi generation.

N is for No problem ji - to find out how that works see H.

O is for Oye which can be surprise (oyye!), a hailing (oyy!), anger (OYY) or pain (Oy Oy Oy).

P is for Panj mint and no matter how near (1 km) or far a Punjabi is from you (100 km) they usually say they'll reach you in panj mint.

Q is for Queue (quow)for which there's really no word in Punjabi.

R is for Riksha, and a Punjabi is always prepared to take one, even if the odds are against them.

S is for Sweetie, Bunty, Pappu and Sonu who seem to own half the cars in Delhi. Just see the rear windscreen.

T is for the official bird of Punjab - Tandoori chicken.

U is for when U lose your sex appeal and become Uncle ji.

V is for VIP phone numbers @ Rs 15 lakh and counting.

W is War on the roads.

X is x-rated words they flow freely in casual conversations on the street.

Y is 'You nonsense!', anger replacing vocabulary in a shouting match.

Z is for Zig-zag for which you should see G, M and P.

Video piracy;Title creativity.