Thursday, November 1, 2007

Dogs v/s. Humans. (Trust me, this is tight!)

Humans don't smell someone's genitals when they meet them for the first time, or as a general form of greeting.

~ Dogs 0, Humans 1


When humans piss where they wish to, they’re cruddy. If a dog does that, they mark their territory.

~ Dogs 1, Humans 1


Except for some tribes, you wouldn’t see a rabble when humans have sex. There isn’t any howling/ growling/ barking around. Dogs group together & always try & pull the mates apart. Plus, there is the howling/ growling/ barking.

~ Dogs 1, Humans 2


If your family loves you enough, you don't have to dilate your pupils at meals, wag or woof to nip in a bite or two.

~ Dogs 1, Humans 3


If humans were to lie down on their backs, legs up in the air, their privates on display, there is a fair chance they’d be arrested for indecorous behaviour. When dogs do the same, its only to cool off, or maybe for a scratch.

~ Dogs 2, Humans 3


If you're a human & you sit with your tongue hanging out, that is deviant behavior. When dogs do the same, they are panting.

~ Dogs 3, Humans 3




Oooh… this is tight!



When in a car, if humans drool with their heads hanging out the window, people look away thinking of them as greedy perverts. When dogs do, they draw attention.

~ Dogs 3, Humans 4


Humans can never do it doggie-style, the way a dog does it.

~ Dogs 4, Humans 4


If you're a dog & you eat a human, you're rabid. If you're a human & you eat a dog, you're Chinese.

~ Dogs 4, Humans 5


For a human, at the doctors’, you don’t have to get your ass probed for every little sign of illness.

~ Dogs 4, Humans 6


Puppies look cuter than human babies.

~ Dogs 5 Humans 6


On that subject, as research & stats go, even dog adults look cuter than human adults.

~ Dogs 6 Humans 6


Except for humans who are too lazy to shower once every donkey year, there aren’t any fleas on them.

(I happen to know one such human who does).

~ Dogs 6, Humans 7


Nancy’s about as bitchy as dogs can get.

~ Dogs 7, Humans 7


Didn’t I tell you this was tight?

:)